We're Young & in Love, so what?

Right now, all I want to do is just pour out whatever is on my mind. I've been reading a few things and hearing things about relationships and there's been a lot going on in my head about the subject. I don't normally talk too much about Darell (my boyfriend, in case you didn't know) online but it's only because I've been thinking about a bunch of different things that I'll talk about us in this post.
*NOTE: These thoughts are all completely my own, and I'm just typing out whatever comes to mind so apologies ahead of time if it doesn't make sense.

Darell & I in 2010 after one of our first dates

Darell and I last sunday at church!

I've been with my boyfriend just over three years, and I can tell you now that those three years have definitely not been a walk in the park. Last year (2012) was, hands down, our roughest year. Somehow, we managed to get through everything and this year has been our best yet. 

Yesterday, one of my friends shared an article on Facebook entitled, "My husband is not my soul mate." I decided to read it because it seemed interesting, and I agreed with what the woman was saying in her post. I'd read similar posts before, and that reinforced certain things I was thinking about. 

This is what some of the blog post said: 

 "God’s plan is for us to be made more holy, more like Christ… not marry a certain person...

There is no biblical basis to indicate that God has one soul mate for you to find and marry. You could have a great marriage with any number of compatible people. There is no ONE PERSON for you. But once you marry someone, that person becomes your one person. As for compatibility, my mom would always pipe up when my girlfriends and I were making our lists of what we wanted in a spouse (dear well meaning Christian adults who thought this would help us not date scumbags: that was a bad idea and wholly unfair to men everywhere) that all that really mattered was that he loved the lord, made you laugh, and was someone you to whom you were attracted. The rest is frosting." -Hannah from theartinlife.wordpress.com (you can read the rest here.)

I'll admit, I've been guilty of this before as well. Of course everyone wants to think that out of the six or so billion people in the world, you found "the One." Throughout the past few months, I've definitely realized that there really isn't one person for you. However, when you're with that person you're with, it is because you consciously choose to be with them and love them every day. 

Now I'm not married, so my situation is a little different. But I bring up that whole concept because I also recently had a conversation with a friend about why I'm choosing to be with one person for the rest of my life and not going out and seeing what else is out there for me. 

I can easily choose to leave my boyfriend and "experience different types of love" as I've heard before, or "test the waters." And although I'm indecisive about a lot of things, my love life is not one of them. 

From growing up in a divorced family and getting my heart severely broken (so much that it affected my self-esteem and self-worth), I decided at a young age that I'd take dating seriously, and that I'd date with the intention of a long-term relationship/marriage. 

So many people think that people who get serious at a young age are more at odds to divorce and have their relationship not end well. I'm not completely disagreeing with that thought. As young adults, your mindset is set on different things like having fun, partying, friends, or whatever it is. But what I am saying is that it does not apply to everyone. 

God gave us the ability to choose for ourselves, so yes it is possible that my boyfriend or myself could change our minds about each other down the road and not end up together. But whether or not that does happen, I will still choose to love him every single day. 

Two people whose thoughts on love and marriage that have really stuck with me over the past few months are things that Darell's mom and uncle have said to me.

His uncle was telling us about the hardships he went through with his family before he married Darell's aunt. Through all of that, he knew what he wanted, and he stood up for it, no matter how crazy he may have seemed. 

One day, I was talking to his mom about my dad's thoughts on relationships, that one fight automatically equals a bad relationship. His mom had been married to his dad for 21 years, and she said that fights are normal and not always a bad thing. In any relationship, romantic or not, it's gonna happen. She said that if you want your marriage to last, you have to fight through those fights, even if you don't want to deal with it. The problem with so many marriages today is that couples forget that promise they make to each other on their wedding day (for better or for worse, for richer or poorer, in sickness and in health, 'til death do us part) and once they get to the "for worse" part, they call it quits. 

However, I am NOT talking about extreme situations like domestic violence. That's something different. What I am talking about is when couples argue or fight or aren't having the best part of their relationship for whatever reasons there are. What Darell's mom talked to me about is that she and her husband talk through whatever it is that they go through and make it work. They still choose to love each other every single day. 

People may say whatever they like about our relationship or the relationships of others who may be in similar situations, but as a word of encouragement, stand up for your relationship and fight through whatever may be going on. You're not alone. 

So even though I may not be married, these kinds of thoughts go through my mind all the time. It's normal to think about, especially if you've been in a long-term relationship with someone. Marriage is a lifetime commitment you make to your friends and family, but more importantly to God. It is something that we all want to do "right," but there is no formula other than having God first, your significant other second, and you last. Everything else is a variable. 

Camp Whittle 2013 // What I've Learned as a Camp Counselor

I'm finally back from camp, and although it was so amazing to be back, I am also very thrilled to be back at home to rest.

It was my first time at Camp Whittle in Big Bear with the San Pedro and Peninsula YMCA in five years, so I was so excited to come back as a camp counselor. When I went to camp as a kid, I had always told myself that I would keep coming back. After my first year of college, I decided that the timing was perfect.

My co-counselor, Victoria, & I!

When I went to my first camp meeting after missing most of them due to being in Peru and another camp, I suddenly felt very out of place. I know that people will always come and go, but I was surprised to see how many unfamiliar faces filled the room. Mostly everyone was already well acquainted with each other, leaving my sister, my friend Samm, and I with each other. However, I was thrilled to see two old camp friends I made when I was a camper myself so long ago. It reassured me that it was a good thing to be back. 

To make it short and simple: this week wasn't as good as it could've been due to my co-counselor and I having 7 out of 8 of the girls being probably the most disrespectful and selfish little girls I have ever encountered. We weren't sure if it was just all of them being together or if they're really like that at home, but it was definitely a hard week. Regardless of all that, however, I must say that for one second I never regretted making the decision of coming back to camp. 

However, what made it easier was having the support of my co-counselor, my counselors-in-training (CIT's) (we all suffered together), my friends, and the directors. It was comforting to get encouragement, suggestions, or similar stories from others, which reminded me that I wasn't alone.

My sister & I with our rags

I also was able to get my brown rag and have the privilege to tie my sister's silver rag. The rag program is a program that the YMCA camps do where each person sets certain goals for themselves as they move up in the rag program. These goals are meant to be long term, lasting either a year or longer, maybe even 10. My friend Yasmine, one of my first friends at camp six years ago, was the one who had tied my brown rag. I am so blessed to have her in my life and still have kept in touch with her throughout the years.

So in short, this week was definitely... interesting. Haha. It was one heck of a ride, but it was all worth it. I'm so happy to have reconnected with my happy place, one of my favorite places to be in the world. I've also learned a few things from being a camp counselor this past summer...

1. Pack more than you need! I know that this sounds like an obvious one, but I was trying so hard to pack lightly that I just thought I could reuse my jeans and sweaters over and over again. WRONG. With all the dust and dirt that comes with being at a camp in the middle of the forest in the mountains, you need to pack adequate changes of clothing to deal with the dirt. Thank goodness my sister let me borrow a sweater and pair of shorts from her to wear for the week. 
2. Go all out! When you're a counselor, it is already a given that you need to actively participate in any and all camp activities. That being said, go big or go home! When you dress up for a themed day/meal, dress all out! You may look or feel stupid, but that's the beauty of camp. You shouldn't care about what others think of you because it's supposed to be a place for people to come together and be themselves. I think this can also apply to daily life as well. I've been learning a lot lately how important it is to put effort into everything you do, rather than making something mediocre just to say you did it. Everything has so much more meaning and feels so much more worth it if you do things that way. Besides, people always say, "If you feel stupid doing it, then you're doing it right." 
3. Patience, my love. Being a camp counselor really teaches patience. If I could only say one thing I'd learn from being a camp counselor at the two separate camps, it would definitely be patience. Whether it is with the kids, with your co-counselor, with an activity, or with the week in general. No matter what goes on in your head as a camp counselor, it is really important to remind yourself constantly that eventually the time will come for whatever it is that you're waiting for. Disciplining myself not to say anything offensive or overtly hurtful to my campers was honestly a struggle that I had to fight at both of my camps. It was all good for me in the end because I'm more familiar with the way that kids work and am slowly learning how to deal with it. Kudos to all you parents out there for that, haha. 

My summer still isn't over, but it's been such a growing experience for me the past couple of months. Just when you think you know yourself, you learn something new. 

Thrifty Nifty: Thrifting Tips

I've been wanting to do some shopping lately, and yesterday I decided to go thrift shopping, or as my friends and I call it, thrifting. I'm so happy to have found a floral long sleeve top and white Gap high-waisted shorts for only five dollars for both! 

I have a lot of friends talk about thrifting, but then they tell me the prices of some of their pieces and it's the price of new pieces of clothing from a store like Forever 21! Honey, that's NOT thrifting!

Now, if the item originally costs more than 100 dollars or is designer, then sure, 20 dollars for it is a great deal! If something is also vintage and you can't find it anywhere else, then sure, that's acceptable too. But for most pieces of clothing, you can usually find really good quality pieces for less than 10 dollars at really good thrift stores. Now that's a deal!

Two new additions to my wardrobe: for the cost of a Subway footlong! Haha. 

Shoot, if I can buy an outfit for only five dollars, then you can surely do the same! All it takes is a good eye, and patience. Here are some tips for thrift shopping: 

1. Scope out different stores until you find one with really good deals! Notice how I don't say, until you find a store with lots of pieces you like. You can find key pieces that you like at any store. The problem that most of us have (including me) is the patience to look thoroughly through the racks to find that diamond in the rough. 
2. Goodwill or Salvation Army are good stores to start thrifting in, but in most places, there are local thrift stores that can get cheaper than the chain thrift stores as well. I got my two pieces above at a local thrift store. 
3. Check, check, check! Of course, when you go to any store with second-hand items, there tends to be little rips/tears, stains, and weird fits with some of the items. That's why it's really important to try the clothes on and check for little things you can't fix like stains before buying if possible. Even though these clothes are dirt cheap, it's always sad to fall in love with a piece of clothing, only to realize that you can't wear it because it can't fit or there's a nasty stain somewhere on it. I found a really cute pair of Tommy Hilfiger denim shorts (probably from the 90's) yesterday that I would've bought over my other shorts, but they were waaaay too tight on me when I tried them on. So please, check. You want your money to be well-spent. 

I wish you the best in your thrift shopping adventures! I hope you find cute pieces at cheap prices so you can bask in the glory of saving money. Got any more tips for thrifting? Leave a comment! 

Te Extraño, Perú

As I’m sitting on the couch back in LA, I can't help but miss Peru so much and wish I was back there. 

Although yes, it was cool and great that we had time to do touristy stuff while we were there, I would have to say that my faith was impacted even more through working with the children and churches we were with and even visiting the beauty that is Machu Picchu itself. 

The children of Colegio de Sagrado Corazon!

I’ll start with all the children we worked with. For about four days, we went to this town called Hijos de Grau to work with children and families near this school called Colegio de Sagrado Corazon. 

For the first two days we went house to house and talked to families, told our personal stories to encourage them, and on the second day, we gave away clothing to them. The last two days were working with the kids, teaching them songs, telling them stories, and spending time with them in general. There was one little girl in particular who caught my attention.

On the first day that we arrived at the school, we got to say hi and see the children that we would work with later on in the week. There was one little girl who wore glasses and looked a little cross-eyed. I didn’t really know why, but I thought she was the cutest thing ever. I thought she was just adorable.

The next day, on the third house that we visited, when I walked into that tiny home, there was that little girl. My team and I had visited her family. After talking with the mother and asking her about accepting Christ into her heart and asking for prayer requests, she brought up the little girl.

Her name is Harumi. She is three years old and she was born blind. Since she’s been born, she’s gone through a series of surgeries to fix her vision. So far, she can see with glasses, but her left eye is a little more messed up than the other. Harumi’s mother asked for us to pray for her upcoming surgery that is supposed to fix that eye.

As I heard that story, my heart was hurting for her. The poor little girl has gone through so much in the three years she’s been living and I’m sure that she was scared. What three year old wouldn’t be scared of surgery?

As we prayed for Harumi and her family, I felt this weird feeling in me. I felt that I needed to talk to the little girl.

The ever adorable, Harumi. 

After we were done praying, I took my group leader aside and asked him if I could talk to Harumi, and he said okay. As I was about to talk to her, I could just feel her pain and I started to cry before anything could even come out of my mouth.  I felt the Holy Spirit asking me to give the family a word of encouragement. I needed them to know that she’d be okay someday, if they would just believe that she would. She would one day be completely healed of her vision problems.

Harumi and her mother started crying as well. They knew that it was a hard situation already but they needed to hold on to hope. I later told Harumi that I think she was so beautiful, and she started to cry. At such a young age, I can’t help but think that she feels self conscious of her situation. I can’t even imagine how she must feel everyday as a little toddler, dealing with something like that. She stole my heart and was the most beautiful little girl I had ever seen.

Another big aspect of what we did that impacted me: soccer, or as the rest of the world calls it, futból. Our group leader, Fernando wasn't kidding when he said soccer was like a religion in Peru. It was through this sport that we met and bonded with some of the sweetest, kindest, funniest guys that we had ever met. Even more so, we fell in love with even more of them at the church that they all go to: Centro Evangelistico. 

The youth of Centro Evangelistico after our last soccer
 match of the trip

This is the church of the pastor that drove us to most places during the trip: Marvin Contreras. It was such a blessing to have him spend time with us for most of the trip. He has such a humble heart and he, his family, and his church welcomed us with open arms. Even though we were supposed to go there to bless them, I think that they blessed us even more. Just watching all of them worship God the way they do, interact between each other the way they do, and even just watching them get to know us and even try speaking the little English that they know so that we can all better understand each other made me so blessed to have them as friends. Because of how much we had all bonded together, it was a little depressing when we found out we couldn't play soccer or say goodbye one last time on Thursday night. I think they were all just as sad as we were. If you wanna know another reason why Centro Evangelistico or its people will always have a special place in my heart: I got baptized there. 

My water baptism

I'd waited so long to be able to be baptized (as in fully submerged) in water. It may or may not seem very important, but I think at the point where I was in my life, the timing was just right. It felt refreshing to physically take away my past life. No, I'm not saying that from now on I'll be perfect (because no one could ever be), but it was a little bit like a new start. And I'm so thankful to have had my Peru team family, as well as the Centro Evangelistico family there with me to celebrate that time. 

I don't think I could ever thank them enough for what they did for us, but I hope that they know that we all appreciate them so much for their friendships. It was also the move of the Holy Spirit in that church (as well as all the others we visited) that showed us all how much more we could be doing for God, how much more we could be showing our adoration to him, how much more we could just love him with our lives.

Finally, there's Machu Picchu. One of the Seven Wonders of the World, I got to see it and hike up the mountain next to it, Mount Waynapicchu.

Me near the top of Mt. Waynapicchu

I must say, it is such a beautiful place to see. You are above the clouds, and you can see for miles and miles. Machu Picchu looks so amazing from the top of the mountain as well. It was pouring rain when we got to the top so it almost felt like a victory of making it past all that sweat (and loss of breath) with the satisfaction of the rain and cold air welcoming you to the top of the mountain. It was probably the hardest thing I've ever physically done. Hiking up almost 8,000 ft is not the best activity for someone with asthma, but every step of it was so worth it. God's creativity is glorified in that place, that's for sure. The mountains, the weather, all the green surrounding the area, even the intact stone structures that the Quechua (not Inca, that's what they called their kings) people built--you can see God in everything.

The famous Machu Picchu!

I know that this is probably the longest post I've written yet, but if you made it to this paragraph, I want to thank you for reading it. This experience was one of the best I've ever had in my entire life, and I think that it's fitting to have it all in one post. I'm so grateful to have done everything I have done, and am looking forward to my next great adventure.

However, I will say about Peru that I definitely do plan to come back, that is for sure. I don't know when, but it is going to happen. Until next time, chau, my lovely readers & friends.

My Food Journey for Dayz: Peruvian Food Diary

I've been in Peru for six days now, and I have fallen in love with the country! We have seen and done so many things and met so many great people, and I know that it's not going to stop for the next week that we still have here.

Today I thought I'd share one of my favorite topics in the world: FOOD!

I think it would be an understatement to say that the food here is great. It's much more than that, but I can't think of a word to describe how delicioso the food is. It is so filling and filled with so much flavor that you can't get in the States.

An interesting tidbit that I learned about Peru quickly is that dinner isn't at the traditional 5 or 6pm like it is in America. They actually have their biggest meal of the day at 1 or 2pm. During our traditional dinner time, Peruvians have snacks or juices or coffee. They do not have tea here at all. I found that interesting.

*UPDATE: Actually, they do have tea here! It's just not as common a drink as in America! The tea I tried is from Cusco/Macchu Picchu area, and it's really good and different [:

Anyways, back to day two of our food journey! On Tuesday we had something that Peruvians call Chifa, or to us Americans, Chinese food. According to our team leader, Fernando, he said that the reason why Peruvians call Chinese food Chifa is because they don't like racism and the food has Peruvian twists on it so they call it Chifa instead. To them, referring to the food as Chinese can come off as racist and so they don't want to offend anyone.

Fried Chicken Filets with a sweet and sour sauce -
Chifa food is some of the best Chinese food I've ever had in my life.

The Chifa food was a huge feast! It was also the day of the Columbia vs. Peru futból match, so that may also have explained all the food.

I didn't take pictures of all the food, but I got quite a few. We probably had in all ten dishes which were all delicious and the best Chinese food I have ever had. We had everything from fried rice, fried wontons with some heavenly sweet and sour sauces (it's so good I roll my eyes thinking about it), so many different chicken dishes, chow mein with vegetables, steaming beef broccoli, and so much more.

Lomo Saltado - just thinking about it is getting my mouth watering!

The next day we ate at another restaurant where you could get traditional Peruvian food, like ceviche (made differently than Americans are used to, but better), Lomo Saltado, or Cuy (I'll explain that later). I got the Lomo Saltado a la Pobre, which is basically pieces of beef with fries, veggies, arroz (rice), egg on top, and plátano (means both plantain/banana) on the side. I've had it before in the States, but everything tastes so much better when you eat it in the country of origin.

Now, back to the Cuy. I said I would explain what it was. Well my friend Christian (pictured below) had always wanted to try guinea pig, something that Peru is known for, and if you haven't been able to guess yet. That's what Cuy is. Yes, it's guinea pig guys. That's a picture of me trying a piece of his Cuy! It looks and tastes like pork with a lot of fat. Haha, it wasn't so bad. I only tried that piece on my fork, don't worry. I know that it sounds disgusting, but I try to be as adventurous of an eater as possible. As someone who loves food, I try to try as many unusual things as possible, especially if it's meat. Hahaha.

Me trying cuy, or guinea pig! It's actually a very common meat here, just like chicken is common to most countries.

The next day, we went to another restaurant that was much nicer than the one the day before and they served very similar food. I decided to get myself some seafood since it's rare that I get an opportunity to eat seafood in restaurants because of the price. Another random tidbit about Peru: all their foods are fresh. They don't freeze anything, so everything you eat was caught or killed that day. The food takes a while to come to you, but that's because the food is very fresh. However, the waits are always worth it.

Chaufa de Mariscos - seafood fried rice

So at this restaurant, I decided to get Chaufa con Mariscos. Chaufa is fried rice with eggs, soy sauce, green onions, and other things. Mariscos, if you know Spanish, is seafood. There was calamari, shelled seafood, scallops, so many other types of seafood. It was SO MUCH food to eat! I was only able to eat a little less than 3/4 of the plate because it was so big with so much to eat. But wow, it was really filling.

Yesterday, we ate at a restaurant that specialized in ceviche and lots of other seafood. There, I tried the Chita Frita, which is basically fried fish. It was a whole fried fish, which may startle some people, but with Filipinos, that's almost always how you eat fish, so that wasn't anything new. It also came with a bowl of so much different seafood in a yellow sauce, but unfortunately I wasn't able to get a picture of that.

And as of that, that is my food journey so far! I haven't even been able to get into the breakfasts we've been eating, juices we've been drinking, and appetizers/sides from all those other meals! It's been all positive so far though. I'm excited for what we'll be eating for dinner tonight and the rest of our meals here in Peru! I'll post another food post at the end of the trip, but this is all for now. I'll try to update on other aspects of the trip, like ministries, futból (soccer), places we visit, and everything else next time I get a chance, but until then, as the Peruvians say, chau! 

On Death & Dying

Recently, my dad's side experienced two deaths in less than a week, so everyone is dealing with a lot of emotions right now. I feel like this is the most appropriate topic to talk about right now.

One time, one of my professors asked our class to individually describe to someone next to us how we picture the story of our lives to be, and he listened in on the conversations. When we came back together as a class, he had noted that none of us mentioned death as part of the story of our lives, although we all know that someday that's how our stories will end.

Although we all know that death is inevitable, many times we don't want to believe it. A lot of us have that "outta sight, outta mind" mentality about the subject. Death is hard no matter which way you go about it, so the grief that comes with it is bound to come along.

I read a devotional one day from this book by a woman named Joyce Meyer, and it talked about grieving. The title was called "Let Yourself Grieve," and the Bible reference was to the shortest one in the entire Bible:

"Jesus wept." 

If you didn't know already, yes, Jesus did cry. This just goes to show that it's okay to grieve. It's okay to show emotion, whatever emotions that may be; God allowed us to have these feelings for a reason. Maybe you've heard this clichéd saying about death before, but it is so true. Lots of people nowadays try to put up a front and show their tough exterior and do everything in their power not to show how they are really feeling. But if you need to cry, cry it out. If for some reason death makes you laugh (even if you don't mean to), let it out. Everyone handles death differently. Some cry, some get mad, some get quiet, and sometimes, others just isolate themselves. However you need to deal, please do it.

Just know, that while there may be pain in the night, joy comes in the morning. God is there to comfort you and remind you that while it's a sad thing that loved ones have left, life goes on and they are in a better place now.

I'm really sad that I didn't know the two uncles that died very well (they lived in the Philippines), but it's saddening to watch my dad deal with the death of a brother-in-law and his only brother. I can't even imagine how it is for my aunt, who lost both her husband and brother in less than a week. Please keep my family in your prayers, as I will be praying for them as well.